


The Twelve Pains of Christmas

by pantheradraconis



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, F/F, Fluff, One Shot, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:06:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28246650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pantheradraconis/pseuds/pantheradraconis
Summary: A mixture of the traditional The Twelve Days of Christmas and the parody The Twelve Pains of Christmas, this is a cute one shot Christmas fluff story.
Relationships: Rosalie Hale/Bella Swan
Comments: 5
Kudos: 42





	The Twelve Pains of Christmas

**On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me a partridge in a pear tree.**

It bothers me that I can mark the exact first moment I saw Bella Swan. Like a whirlwind, she appeared in the small high school of Forks, WA; and like a storm, she stole the hearts of everyone. They pined over her, begging for her attention, for her love. They devoured her words, her mannerisms, her thoughts. For Edward, it was like he was lit up from within; as if the very world had sent him an angel only for him to realize it was a devil in disguise. The very person he wished to know more about, was the same he wished to destroy. We were in a forest and she was merely a tree, I didn’t understand the appeal.

**On the second day of Christmas, my true love sent to me two turtle doves.**

Of course, Edward overcame his thirst and the two became best friends. It was sickening to watch them walk down the halls, laughing, joking. I felt stuck in a Hallmark movie, complete with the tacky couple that had nothing in common yet the whole world seemed to be rooting for them. I mean honestly, what does she see in him? He’s nosy, obnoxious, brooding, and spends more time in other people’s heads than his own. He was like the one light on the strand that refused to light on its own.

**On the third day of Christmas, my true love sent to me three French hens.**

Why did it have to get so much worse? How did this even happen? Alice has never latched onto someone the way she immediately befriended Bella. Now the three are stuck at the hip, laughing, joking, singing even! They go on and on like everything they have to say is worth being heard. It clouds the walls of the house and bounces around in my skull like a headache. I turn up the music as loud as possible but still her voice sneaks in, like a poison keeping me from thinking straight. I snap the front axle in half and the wheel hub falls off. I groan, knowing I’ll have to wait for a new order to come in before working again. 

**On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me four calling birds.**

On the few days when Bella is not in our house, she still manages to cause chaos. Edward’s phone rings at an alarming pace. One message, another, another, and still another. Alice’s phone dings and then Emmett’s. I look over at his phone and see a group message, the four of them are chatting away with Bella. The human is barely able to keep up with the fast pace replies of my siblings. I close my eyes, unable to focus on the movie we are supposedly watching together, and wonder what my cousins are up to. Maybe I could escape to Alaska for a few days. Emmett’s phone beeps again and I look over to see Tonya and Kate are also on the group message. What is the point of having relatives in another state when you can’t escape to them?

**On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me five golden rings.**

Today, I watched Bella. I watched her interact with her little human friends. She listens to them, she smiles when appropriate, she laughs at Mike’s dumb jokes, she side-steps Tyler’s flirting, she pretends to enjoy Jessica’s babbling. Lauren mentions Bella’s time spent with Edward and asks if the two are dating. My ears perk up and I realize I’m leaning forward. I push back against the table, stand up, and throw out my tray. What do I care about the two’s relationship? Outside, the snow is starting to glisten with ice and I debate buying studded tires for Edward’s S60R or deal with Emmett driving the Wrangler like a maniac. Against my own will, I hear Bella answer that she’s not interested in Edward like that.

**On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me six geese a-laying.**

Alice demands a girls’ day out. Normally I love shopping with Alice and Esme but the two insisted on bringing along Bella. The girl is uncomfortable, it’s obvious to anyone that bothers looking at her. She squirms and fakes interest when Alice pulls up an outfit but in the dressing rooms, she groans. After only two stores, she’s dragging her feet and I see her eyes drift toward a bookstore. I don’t know why I do it, but I nudge her, give her an escape, and follow her into the bookstore. Alice and Esme continue on and I’m stuck staring at books written before I was born. I’m left with Bella and therefore required to bring her home. I walk her to the door, unsure why, and am pulled in by Chief Swan for dinner. It’s an awkward affair, like meeting your spouse’s parents for the first time. 

**On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love sent to me seven swans a-swimming.**

For whatever reason, Jasper decides to join the swim team. This causes all seven of us to show up for the meets. I say seven because Bella has somehow been adopted into our family. She sits next to Emmett before being pulled to the front by Angela. She’s given a score sheet, some short directions, a quick thank you, and is left to her own wits. She quickly spins around in her seat looking for help. I sigh and stand up, moving slowly toward her before leaning over the paper and taking her pen. She moves over in the seat, the single-seat, and pulls me in. Her arm wraps around me and she leans in asking a million questions. I forget to breathe.

**On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me eight maids a-milking.**

The group messages continue and for some reason, I’m added to one. Kate talks about traveling, Tonya talks about food, Emmett talks about video games, Alice talks about fashion. Then one day Bella asks about our childhoods. It’s the first time the chat goes quiet. Edward holds a family meeting and states he wants to tell Bella the truth. I’m adamantly against it, I have to be. If we tell her then she’ll be in even worse danger than she has. I’m greatly outnumbered and Edward goes forward with his plan before I’m even able to think of a new argument. 

**On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me nine ladies dancing.**

I’m sitting in Bella’s bedroom completely unsure of how I even got here. She talks on and on about Heathcliff and fate and how bad decisions lead to bad lives. I listen, dithering between agreeing and wondering what her endpoint could possibly be. I fidget, move slowly, adjust my shirt, all the things any normal human girl would do when nervous. She admits that Edward told her the truth. I hold my breath, still as a statue. She watches me and I realize she’s always been watching me just the same as I have watched her. She moves closer to me, the space between us dwindling at an incredible pace. I stand up, make some excuse about my car being parked too far out in the road, and disappear. I didn’t even bother saying goodnight to Chief Swan or using the front door. I collapse in my car, already miles from Forks.

**On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me ten lords a-leaping.**

The stores of Port Angeles lack anything original or interesting. The stores in Seattle are even worse. Why did my family even decide to include Bella in this year’s Secret Santa? I’m ready to drive to LA just to find something worth my money for this ridiculous human girl. Emmett laughs at my insecurity so I hide his Jeep in Vancouver. Alice offers up no help and just repeats I need to go with my gut. My gut tells me that more things should say whether they already come with batteries. I leave another store empty-handed before driving down a long highway. I pull over in a small town, finding a gift shop with the most comical wall of nutcrackers I’d ever seen. I walk around staring at each one before finally giving up and picking out a traditional red and blue uniform with a crown and scepter. It’ll have to do.

**On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love sent to me eleven pipers piping.**

The boys went off on their tangents of how horrible A Christmas Story was before the movie even got through its opening credits. Jasper complained he had already watched it once through that morning but we all agreed that was his own fault. On the couch, Bella sits next to Emmett and struggles with a bag of Reese’s Pieces. I shake my head but move over to her and help open the candy. She smiles at me and pulls me down to sit next to her. A blanket is wrapped over both of us and a container of popcorn is plopped down before I even recognize I’m begging snuggled against. We watch three Christmas specials before gifts are given out. I squirm at Bella’s reaction and end up sneaking her the gift. Her reaction is concerning until she explains she used to have that exact nutcracker given to her by her dad before it was broken in one of her many moves. Her mother had told her it had been silly and she had never replaced it, although she missed having the memory of her dad with her. Perhaps there was some version of fate that existed in the world.

**On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me twelve drummers drumming.**

It was obvious Alice had messed with the Secret Santa choices as Bella admitted she was also mine. As she reached into her pocket to hand me over my gift, I started to feel a heartbeat in my throat. Bella’s anxiety was so strong it caused her heart to thunder in her chest like a drum. I leaned closer to her and whispered my thanks before I even opened the gift. In my hand was a small ornament, a 1915 Harvard Coupe. She explained how the car was a representation of me. It was from the same year and the same state I was born in. Before I realized what I was doing, I had leaned in and kissed her. In the background, I could hear the beat of her heart and the distant voice of Nat King Cole singing Little Drummer Boy. 

**A/N: Merry Christmas!**


End file.
